Chris, Chris, Chris...Where to begin?

First off, we need to fact-check your title. DOES EVERYONE LOVE Cheap Trick? Methinks not.

Leaving that aside, I'm ok with some of your list, with these exceptions:

The Cars - Clearly, you meant to type, "I Totally get the Cars and love their melodies." It's ok; we all make mistakes.

Yardbirds - They're famous for two things:

1) having some of the greatest guitar players ever

2) constantly having those same guitar players leave their band and become superstars.

Have pity on them.

Blues Traveler - I'll excuse you if you didn't realize their debut album was released in 1994.

Bon Jovi - (in Jersey accent) What ya got against Jersey, bro?

Def Leppard - (also in Jersey accent) What ya got against strippers, bro?

But seriously, good post!